It's amazing (well, to me atleast) that you get to really think and ponder about very serious aspects in your life, when you're all wet, (don't let your imagination run wild now!) . Was just having a shower .
I was thinking of the people i know , the people my friends know, my relationships, and theirs. It's strange how so many are surrounded by people who make them feel like crap basically (and that's by choice!). That does include me by the way.
I know that sometimes in any kind of relationships you face arguments, which i think is very healthy to know the person more and even get closer. But what happens when you're with someone who makes you less of a person, abuses you verbally, etc
The question here is how to differentiate between what's healthy and what's going out of line.
It's pretty simple, when you feel the negative energy coming out of you then it's WRONG , wrong to surround yourself with people who are responsible of that kind of energy.
Negative energy can be defined in so many ways, and my definition is quite simple
- When they make you cry and hate yourself (unless you're a cry baby and tend to cry alot, that's a different case)
- When they make you doubt who you really are and make you feel less of a person
- When they twist everything you say into something ugly no matter how good your intentions are
- When your self esteem is quite low having them around
and many more. Hmm not as simple as i thought but here you go, these are the signs. WORK ON THEM
If it's healthy , you forget about your arguments ,act normal the next day, and just pick up another argument. That's okay really, so don't worry too much.
So to all my friends in screwed up abusive relationships. You should know you're worth so much more, you're beautiful, smart , intellectual, etc (this should be in another post) . Just walk out,you know, and i know you deserve so much more.
My father once told me , (he's a very wise man btw) never have high expectations when it comes to people (other than your family) and don't have low expectations either. Be like the "Aber Sabeel" in their lives , take the good things with you and leave the bad things. "aber sabeel" is like the constant traveller, passing by places and people.
as for me, to all the "so-called" friends who get a kick out of making me feel like crap, guess what? i dont feel like crap, actually i love myself, i'm great! and as my dear friend always say "don't hate me cause i'm great, hate me cause I KNOW it" =p
